Emotional intelligence

After reading the “teaching emotional intelligence in the business school curriculum” article I learnt that having a high emotional intelligence (EI) you have more self-perspective to identify, asses, and control your own emotions and the others. As Frank Belizzi says “ emotions do matter in everyday living,and when recognized and used appropriate-ly can enrich our lives, our relationships and our performance at work. So, having a high emotional intelligence is the primary skill for success at work.

After doing the EIQ test I scored 95 of 115, this means that my emotional intelligence is more o less satisfactory. My scored is what I was expecting because I feel that my ability to understand and deal with my own emotions and the others are acceptable but could still use some improvements. I think I understand much better the other’s emotions than mine because sometime I care too much about people that I do not have time for my own needs. Moreover, I think I need to improve my self-awareness because sometimes I do not appreciate my work and I use to be really strike fulfilling my goals. Perhaps by working a bit more my own problems, I can become more confident in dealing with my own emotions and with the others. I think that developing a high EQ can be important not only for the work success if not for your own privacy live. You are able to know yourself better, exploring who you really are and how you deal with others. Improving your EQ we can improve not only our self-awareness and management but also to behave with better ethical reasoning in our lives.

self-disclosure and social Networking

Self-disclosure is personal information that you shared intentionally that another person would have problems finding out without being told. We negotiate between our privacy or not. You choose to tell another person something about yourself and we also choose how to tell it. However, our privacy and self-disclosure can change when the channel changes. We do not self-disclosure in the same way when we are talking face to face with someone than when we are using a social networking. Many people online are available and seeking companionships. You also have the power to secure a profile of the other person before you exchange personal information. When you are talking with someone on-line who you don’t know you can exchange e-mail and talk on the phone without ever revealing your identity. You are available to ignore a person on-line if you don’t feel like talking. You can know how a person thinks and writes just only checking her or his profile. In addition social Networking match people who have similar qualities, interest, and relationships goals, increasing the chances that you will meet someone with whom you are compatible.
However, Social networking has their disadvantages. the message could be misunderstood and also it could create a conflict. As the article ¨social networking: are we revealing too much” says, in face to face encounters, we regulate what we says according to the facial expressions, body I language and immediate replies we get. In cyberspace, we don’t see those visual cues. Moreover, we have to be careful in what we write in our social networking web because some people may be feigning intrest in you and your profile, manipulating you to gain information, or simply having a good time at your expense. Many people, as McMullen, Tyler from the article, are victims of psychopaths who use social networking pages to find their victims. The suicide of Tyler does not have to make us indifernet. We should be really carefully of what personal information we should or shouldn’t share to the world.

Interpesonal Comunication and Conflict

When I find myself in a conflicting situation I don’t always use the same style to solve it. I use different methods when facing conflicts with my family than my friends. If you ask someone from my family about how I deal with conflicts they will say “ she get’s mad easily, and blames us for everything. Moreover, she never listens to what we say and she always wants to have the last word.“ However if you ask some of my friends you will hear a completely different answer “she is always peaceful and an empathic person who rarely gets mad.” In any case, I make unhealthy choices when solving my problems with both of these behaviors. After reading the “Interpersonal conflict and effective communication” article I would say that I use the empathy approach to resolve my problems when I am dealing with my friends but the denying and blaming approach when I am dealing with my family.

When I have a conflict with a friend, I tend to place myself in his/her shoes to understand him/her. I also try to use the ‘I’ statement to show them that they may be right and that I was wrong. When I try to understand the conflict from my friend’s perspective it helps me to open my mind and to respect his/her point of view without getting angry. Sometimes I just let him/her “win” to avoid the situation, using the defusing technique. However, sometimes I just avoid or deny conflicts with them instead of trying to address them and that tends to create problems in the future. Most of my friends think I never get mad and that everything is fine because I always try to avoid conflict. However, the problem still exists and I just keep it bottled up until I explode and I become angry, sometimes blaming the wrong person.

Something really different happens when I am dealing with someone from my family. Believe it or not, sometimes my behavior is the opposite when I am dealing with a conflict within my family. With my family I use to be the person who never listens to anyone, always getting mad and blaming everyone else. I used to lose my temper with them more often than my friends.

This article helped me understand a lot more about my behavior and how to deal with people in different situations. First of all I would try to balance my behavior between my family and friends. This way I will not bottle up my feelings and I will be able to solve conflicts in a peaceful way. One of the solutions I will try to use from the article is the mutually accord with the people I have a problem with. This would work well because I will try to trust and respect him/her, as well as have a positive, constructive attitude to be able to solve my problems in a peaceful way.