People are in continuous interaction with others, and we also receive feedbacks from them. We all begin an interaction with a combination of expectations, requirements and desires. A person’s expectations refer to how they assume another will respond in a given situation. A person’s requirements are how they need the other person to respond; and a person’s desires are how they want the other person to respond. During this week I tried to focus in how this theory works.
Example 1:
Two weeks ago my friend met a guy. We started to hang out with him because she likes him. They were making eye contact all the time and their gestures (smiles, laughs) becoming more intense. When someone wants the the attention of another person keeping the eye contact is really important. As I know my friend well I could perceived that that they like each other. However they were still keeping their distance. This week they started dating each other. At this point they became more affectionate towards each other in public. They were in intimate distance (touching each other, kissing) making obvious that they were together. The distance you keep with someone is really important.You don’t keep the same distance when you are talking with a professor ( long distance) or with a friend or couple (middle-clouse distance).
Example 2:
When my relative told us that she had cancer. Her expression on her face communicated us sadness and her low and shaky voice communicated fair. All of us reacted in a similar way. We were worried about what could be seen in our expressions. One of us was covering his mouth with his hands, while another was biting his nails. We all were upsets and were speechless. We also have the same common thoughts; is she going to get better? What kind of cancer does she has?..etc. Our feelings, thought and actions mirrored each other. We all had a pessimist reaction to our relative’s illness. However, few weeks after my relative was over her illness and she adopted a positive attitude. This positive environment was also transmitted to everyone around her. I remember that a random people ask her about her illness and she was talking about it as it would be a simply cold. The reaction of this person was very different that the reaction that we have at the beginning. He wasn’t as worried as us because she looked healthier and more vital than before. She was able to talk without problems about it and she had no concern about it. This is exactly what she wanted to communicate people: that cancer, a taboo word for many people, shouldn’t transmit fear but hope and strong to get over it.
The way we communicate with people, through words and nonverbal words, can give us different reactions depending on how we speak and on our facial expressions. Words and nonverbal communication are really powerful and they can manipulate people in a good or bad way. My relative, as Mr.Paush, were strong people with the purpose to communicate a positive environment to everyone. Showing that even if they had an illness they could live and be happy as normal people do.
Example 3;
This week I talked with my mother through Skipe. We are really close and my mother can tell quickly if there is something wrong just by observing my gestures. I used to talk to with my mother a lot and tell her everything that is happening here. However, this time I didn’t tell her anything or make eye contact. During the conversation, I covered my eyes with my hands and most of the time I was quiet. After a while my mother started to ask me if I was okey. At the end I told her it was only an experiment to figure out if people can perceive how a person is feeling through gestures.
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